I am in the midst of planning a wedding which we are planning and financing 100% orselves which so far has been good. My grandmother and aunt have lately been giving me gifts for some of the bridal accessories. My grandmother has bought a garter, frilly dress hanger, frilly horseshoe and a few other small pieces. These gestures are really kind and very much appreciated.. The issue I have is that I’ve already purchased or found most of thse items which I love and are great personal touches to the outfit. My grandmother has not bought these items becaus they are nice, they have been purchased at discount shops and to be honest are all really tacky and outdated looking. One of my drawbacks is that I’m a people please and I really don’t want to hurt my grandmothers feelings. I know that if I gave them back it would really really upset her. If I chose not to wear them she would assume I had forgotten them and most probably come running down the road after me with the frilly horseshoe!! I want to keep her happy but at the sanme time I just cringe at the tackyness of them..
Eck!!
What can I do?!?!
Please don’t misunderstand me, I cherish my grandmother! I think the main issue for me is money wasted for me because I had already purchased the hanger (handmade by a friend with my married to be name carved into the wood). I will probably use both. Let it hang on the frilly and then for photos swap it over.
Thanks for the suggestions with the other items. 
)
I love my grandma!!!!
Asked by:ozmoo
Well before she goes out and waste more money you need to tell her that you have everything you need. If there is something you do need let her know that as well. She is just trying to help and probably feels good doing so but you should allow her to help on the things you really do need and want but she will only know that if you tell her.
How much longer you will have your grandma around?
I’m sure she is on a fixed income and is doing the best she can to help you. God bless her!!!
Simply tell her that you have all you need and need no more. As far as the stuff she bought, incorporate it as shower decorations or on the gift table at the wedding.
The garter, she won’t know if you don’t use it.
The frilly dress hanger, use it! is not like you are displaying it, give her that happiness.
The filly horse shoe: use it on the get away car or as decor on your shower.
There, problem solved. Do not hurt grandma’s feelings, one day you will cherish what she had done for you and you will be ashamed of how your spoke of her.
Good luck
What the heck are you supposed to do with a frilly horseshoe!?!?
Is there some way you could ask your grandmother to supply something old/borrowed/blue that belongs to her (as opposed to picking up in a yard sale) that you could discreetly include in your attire somehow? What about a fancy hangar she’s had for awhile that you could hang your dress on? I’m trying to think of some way she could be incorporated into all this and then it would be easier to tell her you don’t want “acquired” items, but rather just one thing that is special to her.
And your aunt, to be blunt, should know better. I would just tell her you’re trying to find something to help grandma feel included, but these other things aren’t your style.
Just say “thank you” and on the big day, leave those unwanted accessories at home.
If you can use just one thing she’s given you, that will win you huge brownie points! For example, even if you don’t want to wear the horseshoe, hold it up and take a picture with it (let Grandma be in the picture, too) and say that it’s your “good luck charm.” Then stuff it in your clutch (or your maid of honor’s purse) and don’t give it another thought.
I mean, seriously, how do you even wear a horseshoe?
Or does it really matter what hanger you put your dress on before the ceremony? This is an absolutely no effort way to appease your grandmother – just put your dress on her frilly hanger and tell her how thoughtful it was for her to get it for you.
Find a way to use what your grandmother has given you. SHE thinks they are nice gifts and she is giving you them because she loves you. The gifts don’t have to be prominently displayed at your wedding, but you do have to use them in order not to hurt her feelings.
To prevent her giving you more tacky gifts, put your arm around her and say, “Grandmom, you’ve given me so many lovely things for the wedding. You’ve been so sweet and generous. But, please don’t buy me any more gifts. You’ve already given me so much and I have everything I need for the wedding. I love you.”
If that doesn’t work and she gives you more presents, use them as well. Grandmom won’t be around forever and you will really miss her when she is gone. Those tacky things aren’t going to ruin your wedding, whereas hurting your grandmother will make you feel bad the rest of your life.
just keep them and use what you want or not..